I was blessed with a lot of amazing students during my time at Arizona State University. Every year the students are able to comment on my excellence as an instructor. I would like to say they taught me, but that is ridiculous. I give you the top 22 comments regarding my adequacy as a teacher of statistics. For each comment, I give you my unfiltered response. This is meant to be comedic. If you take any of this too serious, than you should stop reading and be miserable. Enjoy the fruits of my magical kingdom built by nonsense.
Soon I will post the top comments on how awful I was, but I am in no rush to get that done.
What did you like about the Instructor?
(1) Student: He Seemed Like He Knew What He Was Doing (2012)
Me: I didn’t have any clue what I was doing.
(2) Student: I really loved Mario as a professor! I would never have believed that this was his first time teaching at the college level. He really connected with his students yet maintained a professional relationship and taught us the material very well. His in-class notes were in-depth and helpful and he answered e-mails promptly and always showed respect to us, which some professors don’t do. I wish I could take another one of his classes! (2012)
(3) Student: This class is low stress and predictable, we take notes get tested on them, and I like that. But to make it more awesome we are given the opportunity to review one on one with the instructor after he’s supplied us with test reviews and homework solutions. His lectures are engaging and hilarious but you also learn something. If i could clone him and make him my professor for every class, I would. REAL TALK. Mario, you are the best. (2014)
Me: All I heard was “Mario, you are the best.”
(4) Student: He brought tea. But yeah Mario is a cool guy. (2015)
Me: Glad you care about learning
(5) Student: He tried to make the class less boring. (2015)
Me: I call it Edutainment.
(6) Student: The private tutoring personally helped me the most! (2015)
Me: This is what caused me to spend 6 painful years working on my Ph.Dizzle.
(7) Student: He was always very enthusiastic about the material which made me keen to learn and listen to what he was saying (2015)
Me: Caffeine is a performance enhancing drug.
(8) Student: The bizarre examples. (2016)
Me: You remembered. Success.
(9) Student: How understanding and respectful he was towards all the students.I appreciated the constant reminders of due dates and expectations as well as the implications of not doing well on every exam. He was pretty thorough and used lecture time well. I liked that he made jokes and tried to make connections with all the students. I’m pretty sure that he knows his whole class by name which is a small detail that allowed students to connect with him (and want to pay attention). (2016)
Me: I intentionally tried to not use lecture time well. ;(
(10) Student: The instructor was amazing. Very detailed in explaining and made Pre-calculus fun and easy to learn. (2016)
Me: Pre-calculus should never be fun. I clearly failed this class.
(11) Student: Super Mario is great! He teaches in ways that are easy to learn and makes sure that everyone understands before moving on. (2016)
Me: It is Dr. Mario now.
(12) Student: M agnificent A wesome R eally smart I nteresting O reos (2016)
Me: Creative, but why “Oreos.”
(13) Student: Loved him overall. Would totally wife him up. (2016)
Me: I will examine your grade to see if we can proceed.
(14) Student: Best emails and class dialogue by a professor at ASU so far. (2016)
Me: Ridiculous is memorable.
(15) Student: Keeps the class entertaining. Let’s be honest stats is the WOAT (worst off all time). Giacomazzo makes it manageable. (2016)
Me: Agreed, but it gets me that Gucci.
(16) Student: Some great humor of Italian descent. 10/10 would take again. Please be my professor in all classes, especially genetics. (2017)
Me: My genetics prevents me from teaching genetics.
(17) Student: I love that the instructor is really funny and wants to make people laugh. I never felt like he was going to judge me for asking a stupid question, I appreciated the sense of humor and understanding about the struggle that kids may have with the course. (2017)
Me: You were judged… harshly.
(18) Student: Great voice inflection. Keeps me awake. (2017)
Me: I am still waiting for puberty.
(19) Student: The instructor was very entertaining for the class. His methods of teaching are excellent because it is clear to understand and he explains concepts very well. Overall the best professor I had all semester! (2017)
Me: I am glad I was better than the other 4 teachers you had.
(20) Student: He made me feel special. His smile really lightened up my day and I felt like he really had trust in me and my skills. I think about him a lot because of how great of a teacher he was. This man is a modern day Aristotle and will be remembered by at-least me. (2018)
Me: Now, I am in tears thanks to you.
(21) Student: A really big meme. Enjoyable and it felt like the instructor was a student running the class, in a jovial way. (2018)
Me: I was a student running the class. ASU would lose money if they fired me.
(22) Student: Dr. Mario is very enthusiastic about the subject. I love being in class with him because he really makes the class atmosphere welcoming. (2018)
Me: The atmosphere is sponsored by AXE Body Spray.